I had been angry for so long
that I had forgotten what your blessings felt like.
I cursed your name every day. Brokenhearted,
at the thought that you didn’t care to relieve my suffering.
I rejected you, because they had rejected me. Time passed,
but the anger, the confusion, the loss it didn’t fade.
Then she smiled at me. Told me you held every drop in the palm of your hand.
That I was still alive, but that it was time to start living.
So when she gave all that I had been seeking, like a dam I broke.
They had used your name in such hateful ways, but the truth is
You are love.
You eased my suffering through her laughter,
through the softness of her embrace.
You had found her barely breathing, the light nearly snuffed out, and still –
she smiled for you.
It was then that I knew, I would keep smiling for you too.
Jari G. Planning 