An Impasse.

When he told me he cheated. I didn’t yell. Didn’t scream. Didn’t hate him.

When he told me I had been alone in the love we were building. I simply sighed in disappointment. Dejected.

When he told me he couldn’t – didn’t want to make the decision, I smiled. Of course he didn’t. They never do.

Patted his hand, mourned our ending, and let go. Relief.

Thank you for the time I spent openly bare in my unadulterated love.  But now you won’t be wasting anymore of this time and energy.

Keep what I gave, I found the endless well inside me. I’ll be just fine.

I watched him cry. But I could feel no pity. I gift him this last genuine smile.

“When you’re ready, you’ll choose to be better.”

He said, “you make it sound so easy.”

I shake my head and laugh just a little at his thought. “easy.”

“When you split yourself into so many pieces just to survive a hurricane, the pain from a simple storm doesn’t even compare.”

“You were not the worst to ever happen to me, but you are not the best either.”

We are at an impasse. This is okay. With the truth laid out in front of us

from his lips to my ears – there is no going back.

“Everything is going to change now isnt it?”

I shrug my shoulders. “well…of course. Considering I dont really like you very much at the moment.”

His head sinks to his palms. He’s crying again.

“Just own it. Move on. And stop bullshitting yourself.”

I ask him to leave.

Then I promise myself never again.

– solo dolo | withdrawal

 

 

 

 

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